I have no idea what to do anymore. A mixture of guilt, soft spots which equate to vulnerability, slight annoyance at that person for ruining any progress I'd made & a lot of confusion. These low self-esteem days where I look at myself & wonder why anyone would want to know me, feeling sorry for my parents & sister for having no choice on the matter & myself because I enjoy wallowing in self-pity & am stuck being me. I think it would be only fair for everyone to trade lives regularly & yes, that includes Obama. Ignoring the fact that it wouldn't work out at all & the world would be destroyed, it's a beautiful idea theoretically & we would actually all be a lot more empathetic rather than talking about it all the time.

Now, to walk in my shoes for today in a disjointed, bimbo recount as per usual?

Today was a fantastic day. Double chem was a distillation prac that we'd done before so most of us just sat around while Michelle the mosquito did it for us [with a little help from Joseph & Jimmy those noobs] & I spent a good five minutes listening to Dobsies & Sumedh argue over what the aggregate for 99.95 is- what the ridiculousness. Byun & I were so annoying for the whole double & kept whipping everyone with the tube thing & putting it around people's necks. It was fun. WE HAD FLOOD FOR MATHS. YES CHILDREN, FLOOD. Haha but Woodhouse had left us a test so that was kind of saddening but, yeah, it was alright. Bio speech was super flustering & embarrassing. We got owned in netball but that was to be expected & not the fault of our lovely coach, Ding the horse, at all (: We had many long & meaningful discussions.. LOL jk, about maths. I don't see the appeal of it anymore tbh, I can't see myself doing well in it or enjoying it but I do it because it's just the Ruse mindset that if you do it, it means you're good or something along those lines. I really can't be bothered to really slow down & think about it.

Year 12 will be leaving soon & I know I'll miss them soon but it doesn't seem like the biggest deal at the moment. Maybe after seeing so many grades leave, we've gotten used to the cycle & I didn't have any life-changing friends in that grade although all of them are super funny & cool & it will be sad when they're gone. With that being said..

Never have I been more proud/ashamed to be Korean & proud/ashamed to be a Rusian.

I have no idea what to do anymore. A mixture of guilt, soft spots which equate to vulnerability, slight annoyance at that person for ruining any progress I'd made & a lot of confusion. These low self-esteem days where I look at myself & wonder why anyone would want to know me, feeling sorry for my parents & sister for having no choice on the matter & myself because I enjoy wallowing in self-pity & am stuck being me. I think it would be only fair for everyone to trade lives regularly & yes, that includes Obama. Ignoring the fact that it wouldn't work out at all & the world would be destroyed, it's a beautiful idea theoretically & we would actually all be a lot more empathetic rather than talking about it all the time.

Now, to walk in my shoes for today in a disjointed, bimbo recount as per usual?

Today was a fantastic day. Double chem was a distillation prac that we'd done before so most of us just sat around while Michelle the mosquito did it for us [with a little help from Joseph & Jimmy those noobs] & I spent a good five minutes listening to Dobsies & Sumedh argue over what the aggregate for 99.95 is- what the ridiculousness. Byun & I were so annoying for the whole double & kept whipping everyone with the tube thing & putting it around people's necks. It was fun. WE HAD FLOOD FOR MATHS. YES CHILDREN, FLOOD. Haha but Woodhouse had left us a test so that was kind of saddening but, yeah, it was alright. Bio speech was super flustering & embarrassing. We got owned in netball but that was to be expected & not the fault of our lovely coach, Ding the horse, at all (: We had many long & meaningful discussions.. LOL jk, about maths. I don't see the appeal of it anymore tbh, I can't see myself doing well in it or enjoying it but I do it because it's just the Ruse mindset that if you do it, it means you're good or something along those lines. I really can't be bothered to really slow down & think about it.

Year 12 will be leaving soon & I know I'll miss them soon but it doesn't seem like the biggest deal at the moment. Maybe after seeing so many grades leave, we've gotten used to the cycle & I didn't have any life-changing friends in that grade although all of them are super funny & cool & it will be sad when they're gone. With that being said..

Never have I been more proud/ashamed to be Korean & proud/ashamed to be a Rusian.