I could really do with some encouragement right now but I don't even know what for. If I say I've become closed-off, cold & uncaring, it just sounds like all I do is talk about myself & my selfish little problems but I really don't want to be that person &, at the same time, it's like I can't help it. I'm also so stingy at being that person who gives encouragement & is there for someone when they need it so why should I expect it of anyone else? It's been a long time since I've talked to anybody about anything real. I simply suck at having a personality anymore.

I coughed blood again for the first time in months. I don't know if I'm really sick or not.

I could really do with some encouragement right now but I don't even know what for. If I say I've become closed-off, cold & uncaring, it just sounds like all I do is talk about myself & my selfish little problems but I really don't want to be that person &, at the same time, it's like I can't help it. I'm also so stingy at being that person who gives encouragement & is there for someone when they need it so why should I expect it of anyone else? It's been a long time since I've talked to anybody about anything real. I simply suck at having a personality anymore.

I coughed blood again for the first time in months. I don't know if I'm really sick or not.