So Thursday was Mum's birthday which involved a little more flower buying but without the random luvoing. She's not a huge fan of flowers so I got a little less extravagant basket of orchids but they were still gorgeous. Dr Lee was on that day so we couldn't do much but on Friday, we went out to Eastwood for her birthday dinner. Couldn't go out to city now that I've got no time & everything with year 12 which sucks but we ordered heaps of sushi at Hukuya & it enjoyed it just the same (: Like just way too much food to the point that my sister rejected waffles afterwards. On the way to the car, I got the sudden urge to go to the playground on the upper field, the one with the giant swing? I wanted to show Sarah because the poor deprived child hasn't been to it so we dragged Mum & Dad up to the playground & sat stubbornly in the giant swing & yelled at them to push us. We're such brats haha. Mum ended up having to kick the swing to make us move because we were too fat until Dad eventually came & spun us around. It was fun. More our enjoyment than Mum's but same deal. I know I shouldn't have had that much fun but it was a kind of release from these weeks of year 12 stress.

On Saturday.. seriously, maths homework all day. The workload is insane.

Sunday was fun with outdoor service, massive tug of war, Costco pizza & playing big 2 even though I still don't know how to play so ended up having to show my cards to everyone I was playing with so they could advise me on what I could put down. By the end they were like, "FAR OUT STOP SHOWING US YOUR CARDS". Did confirmation training & then came home to fit in a bit of maths homework before the cousins showed, grandparents & Hee Soo & her dad. We had elegi kimbap & just this massive family gathering where I had to keep Hee Soo constantly entertained since Sarah has yearlies coming up but I don't mind because she's adorable.

Time to sleep. Laters.

Hello, hello, hello. It's been a while but there really isn't much time nor effort to blog lately so I'm just going to do a post about this weekend which was pretty much like all weekends & then go away to wail about my life some more.

So yesterday was my grandma [mum's side] 74th birthday & usually whenever it's any of the grandparents' birthdays, the family just goes out to eat & there's usually not a lot that's special. I also get really ashamed because whenever my birthday come around, I always get money or a lovely present & a card written in Korean I can't read well or English that they can't write well in, but whenever theirs come, I never know till the day & I make no special effort to do anything. So for the first time yesterday, I was like "yeah, I should do something" haha.

I followed Sarah to her tutoring at Dr Lee & studied a bit with Catherine where she told me about her tragic moments when she was super emotional & it was pretty hilarious. I won't go into detail because she probably doesn't want it posted for the world [yes, you are my world, handful of stalkers] to see. Anyways, I ditched her for a bit to go florist with Sylvia & came back with a basket of roses for grandma. It suddenly occurred to me that I never get flowers so I pathetically pretended they were for me for a while. But don't judge because Catherine is also just as pathetic. We're just unloved children. Hence, a good half hour was taken up by taking photos of & with the flowers.



Sarah finished class & we wrote grandma's card. We went to Morning Glory to find a small present to accompany it & ended up buying this tall mug that has a rose as a top. We then decided all that work had made us hungry so we went to Gloria Jeans & tried to buy a regular cookies&cream drink but it was fail because the barista was like "soz, we're outta ice. Can you share a small?" & we glared at them with Asian eyes but accepted it anyway.

Decided that the drink was only an 8.5 because the ice kept getting stuck in the straw & it didn't have the wow factor that 10/10 drinks have. With that, we waited on the little wall outside of Dr Lee & ended up taking more photos. Mum came to pick us up & told us the birthday dinner was cancelled because we got a flat tyre earlier in the day & that made it inconvenient & we were like "nooooooooo, after that mission faaaaaaaarrrrrrrr" pretty much. In the end, we called grandma up & asked her out to Pancakes on the Rocks instead of the original planned dinner in Eastwood without Dad.

In the car, we simply decided that our attractiveness could not be contained & took more shots of ourselves.



Hehehe.

We got to grandma's house & delivered the flowers + the small present but grandpa didn't join us because he was sick. So it was really just Grandma, Mum, Sarah & I & we sat outside on the verandah of Pancakes on the Rocks & literally just devoured everything without saying much because that's the way we roll. I think grandma was very happy because otherwise, she would've been pretty lonely on her birthday with just grandpa at home. Also, I'm so proud of her because she's learning English at TAFE right now & she's on the highest level so she can pretty much understand half our conversations now. It's pretty inspiring & she told us that she does it because she wants to be remembered as someone who tried their hardest after she dies & made us promise that we'd remember her like so. Mum cut off that soppy moment by going, "mum, seriously. You're not going to die anytime soon, quit speaking like that". We planned on eating her birthday dinner with just the four of us & then cake/celebration with the rest of the family on Sunday. Dropped grandma back home & tried to study a bit more but to no avail because Dad soon came home & popped his head through my door & told me that cake could simply not wait so we had the cake/celebrations on Saturday as well.

So all of us went to my grandparents house again, sang happy birthday, cut the cake & everything. Grandma kept trying to cut fruit for us & Mum kept stopping her because we had to leave soon which made me feel sorry for her but we ended up eating pear anyway. It always ends up like that.

My parents & grandparents talked a bit about our new house & then.. about my future now that I'm in year 12. It's really scary because both sides of my family have extremely high expectations for me for some reason. Like on my Dad's side, I'm the first grandchild so they're counting on me to follow in Dad's footsteps in becoming a doctor. I guess I should be grateful they don't expect me to get into usyd like him but even so, it scares me. Not because I don't want to, because I want to more than anything & for a long time, but because I don't think I'm even capable of it. There's just been a lot of self-doubt & feelings of crashing & burning lately. There's that same but more subtle pressure from my Mum's side because I'm not the oldest but there's Yvonne who's almost finished dentistry & Edward who's a couple months younger but some crazy super genius. My parents never enforce study so I could pretty much play all day if I wanted to but I know the reason they don't is because they trust me to make the right choices. That's possibly the worst pressure of all. I think I'll just have to wait & see. Everyone's so supportive though which I'm so blessed with. Oh, with the exception of Miss Sarah Bak who is convinced that I will end up living off government social support or marrying someone that only she approves of because he will buy her a red convertible apparently. Thanks sis.

It was a nice Saturday I think. Today was pretty much the same as every Sunday. I was at church for most of the day & had confirmation training which was.. silent. Before that, the year 11s/new year 12s went down for chips at the shops & the year 12s [who are supposed to be studying] were also there & then went back up to church to game & watch movies.

I've been youtubing so much spoken/writ poetry from Sarah Kay & Andrea Gibson lately. They make you fall in love with their words. It's amazing. I'll post a couple videos from them later.










Not feeling much better, headaches, my chest & stomach feel knotted & I just felt like collapsing today from tiredness. Grossoshan haha, but definitely be better by next week.

RACHEL ! I completely agree with your post about modern day & how we suck. But, as you can see, I can't articulate it very well due to the fact that, among the many things modern day sucks at, we suck at expressing ourselves. So thank you very much for doing it so eloquently (:

& something slightly relevant to it I was watching yesterday about a woman who insists on living like the 1950s because she thinks the world today is ugly.

I want-eth to feel this kind of utter satisfaction. But seriously, have you ever seen such a smug mutt? :DD
Hahaha my blog posts have such substance 8)



So, haven't been having the most fun holidays but it's worth it because I'd be scared to death starting school if I was too underprepared. Matrix has been fun & don't worry I haven't gone insane, it's fun because of the people & food :D But really, it's not as bad as I thought it would be. I've been living off Hero sushi though & have not had froyo once because, clearly, you've all been wanting to know. Yesterday, after church, family went out to Criniti's for dinner & had San Churros which made up for the whole tiring, sick & stressful week. I've also spent a lot of time youtubing really embarrassing things but I can't help it, like not joking, if you saw my 'recommended videos' column, you'd be like "what the retarded".

I don't actually have a lot to say but just asking, is a lack of confidence or overconfidence more likely to contribute to a person's downfall? Up till now, I thought overconfidence because if someone is insecure, they might be more motivated or try harder to overcome whatever obstacle but then it's also possible that that might paralyse them altogether, you know? In the same way, someone's overconfidence might actually help them in allowing them to reach out of their comfort zone & do it anyway even though, realistically, it wasn't within their capabilities like bungee or skydiving.. or, you know, they could fail. So which do you reckon ?

*edit: also, Yadha, since you forced this blog post out, it's your turn, right ?

So Thursday was Mum's birthday which involved a little more flower buying but without the random luvoing. She's not a huge fan of flowers so I got a little less extravagant basket of orchids but they were still gorgeous. Dr Lee was on that day so we couldn't do much but on Friday, we went out to Eastwood for her birthday dinner. Couldn't go out to city now that I've got no time & everything with year 12 which sucks but we ordered heaps of sushi at Hukuya & it enjoyed it just the same (: Like just way too much food to the point that my sister rejected waffles afterwards. On the way to the car, I got the sudden urge to go to the playground on the upper field, the one with the giant swing? I wanted to show Sarah because the poor deprived child hasn't been to it so we dragged Mum & Dad up to the playground & sat stubbornly in the giant swing & yelled at them to push us. We're such brats haha. Mum ended up having to kick the swing to make us move because we were too fat until Dad eventually came & spun us around. It was fun. More our enjoyment than Mum's but same deal. I know I shouldn't have had that much fun but it was a kind of release from these weeks of year 12 stress.

On Saturday.. seriously, maths homework all day. The workload is insane.

Sunday was fun with outdoor service, massive tug of war, Costco pizza & playing big 2 even though I still don't know how to play so ended up having to show my cards to everyone I was playing with so they could advise me on what I could put down. By the end they were like, "FAR OUT STOP SHOWING US YOUR CARDS". Did confirmation training & then came home to fit in a bit of maths homework before the cousins showed, grandparents & Hee Soo & her dad. We had elegi kimbap & just this massive family gathering where I had to keep Hee Soo constantly entertained since Sarah has yearlies coming up but I don't mind because she's adorable.

Time to sleep. Laters.

Hello, hello, hello. It's been a while but there really isn't much time nor effort to blog lately so I'm just going to do a post about this weekend which was pretty much like all weekends & then go away to wail about my life some more.

So yesterday was my grandma [mum's side] 74th birthday & usually whenever it's any of the grandparents' birthdays, the family just goes out to eat & there's usually not a lot that's special. I also get really ashamed because whenever my birthday come around, I always get money or a lovely present & a card written in Korean I can't read well or English that they can't write well in, but whenever theirs come, I never know till the day & I make no special effort to do anything. So for the first time yesterday, I was like "yeah, I should do something" haha.

I followed Sarah to her tutoring at Dr Lee & studied a bit with Catherine where she told me about her tragic moments when she was super emotional & it was pretty hilarious. I won't go into detail because she probably doesn't want it posted for the world [yes, you are my world, handful of stalkers] to see. Anyways, I ditched her for a bit to go florist with Sylvia & came back with a basket of roses for grandma. It suddenly occurred to me that I never get flowers so I pathetically pretended they were for me for a while. But don't judge because Catherine is also just as pathetic. We're just unloved children. Hence, a good half hour was taken up by taking photos of & with the flowers.



Sarah finished class & we wrote grandma's card. We went to Morning Glory to find a small present to accompany it & ended up buying this tall mug that has a rose as a top. We then decided all that work had made us hungry so we went to Gloria Jeans & tried to buy a regular cookies&cream drink but it was fail because the barista was like "soz, we're outta ice. Can you share a small?" & we glared at them with Asian eyes but accepted it anyway.

Decided that the drink was only an 8.5 because the ice kept getting stuck in the straw & it didn't have the wow factor that 10/10 drinks have. With that, we waited on the little wall outside of Dr Lee & ended up taking more photos. Mum came to pick us up & told us the birthday dinner was cancelled because we got a flat tyre earlier in the day & that made it inconvenient & we were like "nooooooooo, after that mission faaaaaaaarrrrrrrr" pretty much. In the end, we called grandma up & asked her out to Pancakes on the Rocks instead of the original planned dinner in Eastwood without Dad.

In the car, we simply decided that our attractiveness could not be contained & took more shots of ourselves.



Hehehe.

We got to grandma's house & delivered the flowers + the small present but grandpa didn't join us because he was sick. So it was really just Grandma, Mum, Sarah & I & we sat outside on the verandah of Pancakes on the Rocks & literally just devoured everything without saying much because that's the way we roll. I think grandma was very happy because otherwise, she would've been pretty lonely on her birthday with just grandpa at home. Also, I'm so proud of her because she's learning English at TAFE right now & she's on the highest level so she can pretty much understand half our conversations now. It's pretty inspiring & she told us that she does it because she wants to be remembered as someone who tried their hardest after she dies & made us promise that we'd remember her like so. Mum cut off that soppy moment by going, "mum, seriously. You're not going to die anytime soon, quit speaking like that". We planned on eating her birthday dinner with just the four of us & then cake/celebration with the rest of the family on Sunday. Dropped grandma back home & tried to study a bit more but to no avail because Dad soon came home & popped his head through my door & told me that cake could simply not wait so we had the cake/celebrations on Saturday as well.

So all of us went to my grandparents house again, sang happy birthday, cut the cake & everything. Grandma kept trying to cut fruit for us & Mum kept stopping her because we had to leave soon which made me feel sorry for her but we ended up eating pear anyway. It always ends up like that.

My parents & grandparents talked a bit about our new house & then.. about my future now that I'm in year 12. It's really scary because both sides of my family have extremely high expectations for me for some reason. Like on my Dad's side, I'm the first grandchild so they're counting on me to follow in Dad's footsteps in becoming a doctor. I guess I should be grateful they don't expect me to get into usyd like him but even so, it scares me. Not because I don't want to, because I want to more than anything & for a long time, but because I don't think I'm even capable of it. There's just been a lot of self-doubt & feelings of crashing & burning lately. There's that same but more subtle pressure from my Mum's side because I'm not the oldest but there's Yvonne who's almost finished dentistry & Edward who's a couple months younger but some crazy super genius. My parents never enforce study so I could pretty much play all day if I wanted to but I know the reason they don't is because they trust me to make the right choices. That's possibly the worst pressure of all. I think I'll just have to wait & see. Everyone's so supportive though which I'm so blessed with. Oh, with the exception of Miss Sarah Bak who is convinced that I will end up living off government social support or marrying someone that only she approves of because he will buy her a red convertible apparently. Thanks sis.

It was a nice Saturday I think. Today was pretty much the same as every Sunday. I was at church for most of the day & had confirmation training which was.. silent. Before that, the year 11s/new year 12s went down for chips at the shops & the year 12s [who are supposed to be studying] were also there & then went back up to church to game & watch movies.

I've been youtubing so much spoken/writ poetry from Sarah Kay & Andrea Gibson lately. They make you fall in love with their words. It's amazing. I'll post a couple videos from them later.










Not feeling much better, headaches, my chest & stomach feel knotted & I just felt like collapsing today from tiredness. Grossoshan haha, but definitely be better by next week.

RACHEL ! I completely agree with your post about modern day & how we suck. But, as you can see, I can't articulate it very well due to the fact that, among the many things modern day sucks at, we suck at expressing ourselves. So thank you very much for doing it so eloquently (:

& something slightly relevant to it I was watching yesterday about a woman who insists on living like the 1950s because she thinks the world today is ugly.

I want-eth to feel this kind of utter satisfaction. But seriously, have you ever seen such a smug mutt? :DD
Hahaha my blog posts have such substance 8)



So, haven't been having the most fun holidays but it's worth it because I'd be scared to death starting school if I was too underprepared. Matrix has been fun & don't worry I haven't gone insane, it's fun because of the people & food :D But really, it's not as bad as I thought it would be. I've been living off Hero sushi though & have not had froyo once because, clearly, you've all been wanting to know. Yesterday, after church, family went out to Criniti's for dinner & had San Churros which made up for the whole tiring, sick & stressful week. I've also spent a lot of time youtubing really embarrassing things but I can't help it, like not joking, if you saw my 'recommended videos' column, you'd be like "what the retarded".

I don't actually have a lot to say but just asking, is a lack of confidence or overconfidence more likely to contribute to a person's downfall? Up till now, I thought overconfidence because if someone is insecure, they might be more motivated or try harder to overcome whatever obstacle but then it's also possible that that might paralyse them altogether, you know? In the same way, someone's overconfidence might actually help them in allowing them to reach out of their comfort zone & do it anyway even though, realistically, it wasn't within their capabilities like bungee or skydiving.. or, you know, they could fail. So which do you reckon ?

*edit: also, Yadha, since you forced this blog post out, it's your turn, right ?