Neglecting my blog quite a bit but..

Last Saturday was my grandpa [on my dad's side] 80th birthday so we went to Cyren restaurant at Darling Harbour & had lots of delicious, overpriced seafood. My cousin, James, couldn't stop eating the ribs & Sarah on my other side couldn't stop eating the mussels. So I was stuck between two fatasses & just took photos. During the week, I thought about a lot of things because of one thing happening that shouldn't have affected me technically but it did &, while making me sad, it taught me to appreciate what I have more. I couldn't imagine what would happen if any sort of tragedy hit me. I would never be as strong.

Other than that, I don't really remember but it was all sort of hazy. Nothing significant except talking to someone very special recently & drowning in homework which I should be doing now. Also, beautiful people & musical auditions which was, of course, fail for me but what I regret most was not being able to stay to listen to everyone else.

I always feel like I'm waiting for the day to pass so I can have a fresh new start tomorrow, just half-hearting everything & barely making it through the day. It's such a simple mind-set but it just means I'm wasting everything I have. I need more focus & more fun. I need a hobby but I don't need a distraction. I need motivation but I don't need someone to tell me what to do. It's like a cycle of small bursts of momentary fun but, in the end, having accomplished nothing. So, I'm wanting to give those small bursts up for the greater happiness at the end- like that truly fulfilled feeling after having sacrificed a bit. Which leads me to think that maybe everything is in balance. We take what we give- in our time & effort at least. I always need to be working towards something. But something that makes me ashamed most of all is that I've just been talking about myself through this whole post. I really need to be less selfish. Also, I need to join up these short sentences.

Neglecting my blog quite a bit but..

Last Saturday was my grandpa [on my dad's side] 80th birthday so we went to Cyren restaurant at Darling Harbour & had lots of delicious, overpriced seafood. My cousin, James, couldn't stop eating the ribs & Sarah on my other side couldn't stop eating the mussels. So I was stuck between two fatasses & just took photos. During the week, I thought about a lot of things because of one thing happening that shouldn't have affected me technically but it did &, while making me sad, it taught me to appreciate what I have more. I couldn't imagine what would happen if any sort of tragedy hit me. I would never be as strong.

Other than that, I don't really remember but it was all sort of hazy. Nothing significant except talking to someone very special recently & drowning in homework which I should be doing now. Also, beautiful people & musical auditions which was, of course, fail for me but what I regret most was not being able to stay to listen to everyone else.

I always feel like I'm waiting for the day to pass so I can have a fresh new start tomorrow, just half-hearting everything & barely making it through the day. It's such a simple mind-set but it just means I'm wasting everything I have. I need more focus & more fun. I need a hobby but I don't need a distraction. I need motivation but I don't need someone to tell me what to do. It's like a cycle of small bursts of momentary fun but, in the end, having accomplished nothing. So, I'm wanting to give those small bursts up for the greater happiness at the end- like that truly fulfilled feeling after having sacrificed a bit. Which leads me to think that maybe everything is in balance. We take what we give- in our time & effort at least. I always need to be working towards something. But something that makes me ashamed most of all is that I've just been talking about myself through this whole post. I really need to be less selfish. Also, I need to join up these short sentences.